Whispers of Rest - Not Your Typical Devotional Book

“Quiet isn’t the absence of movement.  Quiet is a movement to trust you were meant for more than striving.  You were meant to be fully alive.  When you give yourself permission to just breathe, you can just be.” 

- Bonnie Gray

I can’t remember the last time I chose to bring my laptop outside. 

The sounds are different.

The breeze is refreshing.

The birds sing, fly, and observe their surroundings… all trying to figure out why there’s a girl in a lawn chair... 

Even the chickens are out today… unusually calming, since on most days they’re locked inside their coop.

Meet My Friends: The Inspire Shop & A Giveaway!

Today you're in for a special treat!
I have been anticipated this post for a LONG time, as I've been parading around my house and secretly enjoying my "Write Your Heart Out" mug for the past few weeks.  (Hint... keep reading for an exclusive giveaway!)

What Happens When I Get On The Treadmill In Tears...

Yesterday was one of those mornings...

The day before was a rough one, too.  And despite my consistent attempts to start my mornings with Jesus, my Bible and a colorful pen, I don't always succeed in listening to His "good morning" voice.  On the contrary, my week had been a silent culmination of moody days that led to the massive emotional (and hormonal) exchange I had with my children and my husband.

All In... A Daring Plan.

Can I just say that LOVING my times in God's Word every morning is an understatement?

I mean... sure, it's NOT perfect, but the Lord has a way of faithfully speaking through His Word.  DUH... that's HIS very words we're talking about.  Right?

This morning was no ordinary morning.  This morning was my kids' first day of school.  It was the day when I was supposed to wake up super early, have a "quiet" time, pray, make breakfast, wake kids up, and get them ready for school.  Well, let's just say that... they got up, had breakfast, and were ready for school in less time than I was planning on giving them (and me!).  First day of school.  First day.  First.  And I know it won't be the last time that happens.  I just know.  And that's ok.

Grace.

And in His perfect grace, He brought me to today's reading in 1 Samuel 14:1-15.

Wow!  Can I just say... WOW!

I needed these 15 verses of Scripture today.

So, if you're ready this post, STOP.  Get your Bible, open to 1 Samuel 14 and read the first 15 verses in this chapter...

I'll wait...  

Go!  

Read it!

Okay.  Sooo...  Jonathan's "Daring Plan" to defeat the Philistines was nothing short of... DARING!  He was going to take on this giant army, while his father's coward group of Israelite-Soldiers-Wanna-Be, which were all hiding in holes, caves, rocks, cisterns... (yes, hiding!).   And you know what really spoke to me?  Jonathan's vision for this plan was to somehow climb those cliffs, trusting that God would fight the battle for them.  In verse 6 (I love this!), he says, "Perhaps the Lord will help us, for NOTHING CAN HINDER THE LORD.  He can win a battle whether he has many warriors or only a few."  WOW!

WOW!!!!

So, with that faith, Jonathan proceeds to climb that cliff with "both hands and feet", verse 13 tells us.  BOTH HANDS AND FEET.  Wow!  He went ALL IN!  He trusted the Lord, then did all he could, giving all he had, to climb that cliff.  He faced the Philistines with both FAITH and ACTION.

I want that same faith living in me.  Don't you?  The faith that assures me that I can conquer anything with the Lord.  That He can win ANY battle for me.  

And the other side of this beautiful story, was that Jonathan was not alone.  He had an armor bearer who not only believed with Jonathan.  He also fought WITH and FOR Jonathan. Verse 7 shows Jonathan's armor bearer's trust and dedication to him, "Do what you think is best,...I'm with you completely, whatever you decide (NLT)."  The NIV says, "I'm with you heart and soul."   And that reminds me that I'm not to fight my battles without a friend, a partner, someone to keep me accountable, to believe for and with me, and to fight with me when needed.  At the end of those 15 verses, it says that Jonathan and his armor bearer killed 20 men that day.  

Okay... count with me...

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19...20!

Sometimes we read stories in the Bible where the Israelites killed tens of thousands of people.  I can't even wrap my mind around that.  But I CAN visualize the killing of 20 individuals.  NO EASY TASK... right?  

Please, don't tell me you could do that alone!  Jonathan couldn't.  I KNOW I sure couldn't!

AND THEN... the Lord sealed the deal!  He sent an earthquake at the end!  WHAT!!!!  

So epic!!!

I love how God works!

So, here's my plan of action right now. 

1. As I fight my battles, I'm choosing to believe that God can win any of them for me! 

2.  I need to fight with BOTH HANDS and FEET.  Go ALL IN!

3.  I need to partner with a good friend (or spouse) to fight the battles with me.

How about you?  Did you take the time to read 1 Samuel 14:1-15?  Do it!  Are you facing some battles right now?  Do you believe that He will fight for you, if you trust in Him and go all in?  Do you have a friend, a partner, an armor bearer to fight with and for you?

Writing Love Letters... A Review.

Do you remember waiting for the mailman to deliver the mail, in hopes that "somebody" sent you that so-awaited letter?  A note?  A card?  A LOVE letter?

I remember those days... I remember waiting for my Dad's letters whenever he left for long trips.  I still remember letters from Singapore.  I think he was gone for 40 straight days!  Wow... can't believe my mom made it without him, raising all 4 of us!  Whew...  

And I remember waiting for letters from friends... every Summer after camp, after moving away, and especially after moving from Brazil to the US.  I craved communication in my own language.  

Until... the letters seemed to disappear.  They seemed to have been replaced by those... emails... then texts... and now Facebook messages.  Crazy, right?

But if you're anything like me, you still crave those hand-written notes.  

If you're anything like me, you still love writing and sending hand-written cards, letters, and Love notes.  That's right... LOVE notes!  And I'm not talking about letters to your "lover".  I'm talking about LOVE notes.  Notes that express how much you LOVE someone, or something done for you, or an act of kindness.  

A few months ago, I received a book called "The World Needs More Love Letters: All-in-One Stationary and Evelopes" by Hanna Brencher from the Blogging for Books program in exchange for this review.  

The idea behind this gem is to provide the "reader", an easy and all-inclusive tool to get your mind going, your ideas flowing, your inspiration and motivation ready to send that special someone a quick note.  It's a pad with 40 lined stationary papers, that when folded, it becomes its own envelope... which is also all ready to be addressed, stamped, and sent!  Just enough lines.  Just enough space.  Just enough "cuteness" to call it stationary.  

I love the idea!  

I also love the convenience!

AND... I love the inside cover suggestions and inspirations for Love Letters... such as:

 - "Put your heart on one of these pages for a teacher who has gone above and beyond to make you a better person."

- "Write down your best life lessons and tuck this letter in a favorite coffee shop for someone else to find."

- "Getting married in the morning?  Write a letter to the one who will be holding your hand at the altar and deliver it before the wedding bells ring."

And there are 37 other suggestions...  So clever!

BUT, the best part of this tool, in my humble opinion, was the opportunity I had to share this "art" of letter-writing to my children.  My 4 year-old can't read or write, yet, but she used one of these pages to draw a picture of herself and send it to her friend.  Well, she ended up drawing 3 pictures of herself and sending all of them to her friends.  I love that!  And the anticipation she had, that her friends would receive her drawing in the mail!

  

And just lately... I've been using it to write those quick notes to the people that come to mind, at random times.  Y'know... those times when someone comes to mind and you tell yourself, "I should text her/him and see how they're doing", or "Hmmm, I forgot to say hi at church.  I should call or check in on FB."  I'm taking those prompts to actually sit down and write them a little note.  It would make those contacts so much more special.  Thinking about praying for them as these notes are being sent as well.  

Overall, I enjoyed using this "book" for the first time this Summer.  And I'll continue to use it until the pages are no more... but hopefully, until then... this Love Letter writing will become a habit.  

Cute Kimono girl post-it notes NOT included...

How about you?  When was the last time you write someone a Love letter?  When was the last time someone wrote YOU a Love letter?  It doesn't need to be elaborate... just thoughtful.  

How To Make Bible Reading a Part of Your Day

I have totally been STRAIGHT UP neglecting this space, haven't it?

But I will NOT try to come up with excuses why.  Because I KNOW why.

It's because I've been LIVING MY LIFE...

Breathing...

Moving...

Laughing...

Taking in every breath from God...

...then exhaling to bless the ones around me.  More specifically, my family.

I've been on a journey this month and God has been speaking to me so clearly through His Word, the Bible.  The Holy Scriptures that we so often take for granted and let dust find its home on it, all the while the LIFE that moves, creates, inspires and always reflects God's unconditional love and care for us, gets... forgotten.

Forgotten... yes, forgotten.

We "think about it".  We "want to read it."  We even "carry it" around.  

We post pictures of it up.  We fill it with our most precious treasures... our kids pictures, valentines, a cute drawing, or a love note.  But its VERY WORDS get... forgotten.

We remember a verse here and there.

We recognize a word or two when it's quoted.

But the intentions of "wanting" to read it, aren't actually giving us the LIFE we need.

I won't claim perfection.  EVER!  So, hear this from a sister who is still growing and is on an ever-changing journey to being more like Jesus.  

As I thought about some of the lessons I've been learning this month, I decided to focus on the PRACTICAL ways to make Bible Reading part of our daily routines.  So, here it is:

1. Make it a priority.

Did you know that priority is a singular word?  When we use the word priority in a plural form, it becomes priorities.  Ok, Helen... duh!  But humor me for a sec.  When we use the word priorities, it defeats its purpose.  Priority means there is a single most important item that needs to be at the top.  Right?  To put our priorities in place, it just means we have too many things taking place of the #1 priority in our lives.  Our relationship with Jesus.  When I choose to "put our priorities" in place, am I saying that there are other things/people/places that are equally important than my relationship with Jesus?  And the answer is YES.  I want to make my time reading the Bible a PRIORITY.  Period.  No buts, ifs, or lame excuses.  Because that is essential to getting to know Jesus.  And I want to KNOW Him.  Do you?  It all starts with a decision.  Choose to make it a priority.  

2.  Schedule a time.

Setting aside a chunk of time that was uninterrupted was a challenge for me.  I get Joshua up for school at 6:30am and... confession time here... I do NOT like to get up any earlier than that.  Sure, it would be the "holy" thing to do, right?  Get up before everyone else does.  Sit on a comfy chair and soak in all that the Lord has to tell me...  BUT, unless I choose to get nothing done the night before and go to bed before 10pm, this sister is NOT getting up much earlier than that.  So...  what was THE time that was going to work for me?  Anytime between 8-9am.  It's after Joshua was gone on the bus, after I fed all the kids breakfast, but before Joel was out to the office.  That's when I choose to sit with my Bible.  This might look different for everyone.  For some, this will NEED to be before all your family is up.  It might be late at night.  It might be at nap times.  But finding a time that WORKS for your schedule and life rhythm will help you stay consistent and intentional.  

3.  Get a "spot".

I sit at my kitchen table.  After the kiddos are done with breakfast.  After the dishes are in the sink (unwashed... of course!).  Sometimes I choose to sit at my dining room/living room area, but I find that I get more distracted.  Sometimes I want to just sit at a comfy chair in the living room with my Bible and coffee at hand.  But again, I find myself getting distracted.  So, the kitchen table allows me to focus a bit more.  And that works for me.

4.  Let others know about it.

My family now knows that when I'm at the kitchen table, with my "big" Bible, I am NOT to be interrupted.  Sure, I still get interrupted, but the kids are getting better at just playing on their own, reading books, coloring, or simply... running around the house.  But I learned to adjust.  This time is important and I can deal with their messes AFTER this time with God.  My husband is also aware of what I'm doing, so he tries to protect my time at the kitchen table as well.  As much as it is possible, if he is around, he'll try to manage the chaos "behind" me.  If you need to lock yourself in your room for that time, let others know what you're doing.  Do Not Disturb signs can be put to use here, too! ;)  Or, if you need to leave the house, do it!  I would've LOVED to be able to sit somewhere else to read my Bible... a coffee shop, library, bookstore, even church.  But staying home is just more practical for my stage in life.  

5. Make a plan.

Ok, this one sounds a bit scary, but, TRUST ME, it will really help you!  Pick a book of the Bible you’ve been wanting to dig deeper, or a portion of Scripture that you’re curious to know more about.  The Gospels are a great bunch (Mathew, Mark, Luke, or John) during this time of the year.  Paul’s letters, the Psalms, or Proverbs.  Whatever you do, pick a book of the Bible and stick with it.  I’m sure God has spoken through random “just-opened-my-Bible” situations, as His Word is alive and does not return void.  But “knowing” where you’re reading each day can ease your anxiety.  For me, personally, I’ve been MORE THAN ENJOYING readying through my Chronological Bible.  It’s been so eye-opening and so refreshing to read God’s Word as a chronological account.  I confess, though, that right now it’s been a stretch to have some real practical lessons come out of Leviticus, but… I’m pushing through and God’s been faithfully speaking to me (more on that to come).

6.  Don’t rush.

I’ve been trying to engage with each text in front of me for that day.  Sometimes it’s a whole chapter, sometimes 2.  And sometimes I’m having a flood of insight and a deep conversation with the Lord over a single verse.  But I’m giving myself permission to either stop and reflect, or to just “keep reading” until I hear His voice.  But you know what… it’s so rewarding to know that in my daily reading, Jesus is with me.  Right there.  It’s a coffee date.  Every day!  I keep thinking about how sweet it would be to have a coffee date with Jesus.  Ok… haha… would Jesus really have a latte with me?  Would He take creamer, sugar, or just black?  Helen, Helen… Jesus would just LOVE to be spending time with you, sister!  So… don’t rush!  And if you need to rush, remember to ENGAGE in the conversation at hand.  Even if for a brief moment…  He deserves our full attention.  He might say something to us through His Word… Huh… what a concept!

7.  Take notes

The act of writing down my thoughts on a journal has been absolutely life-breathing and live-giving to my soul.  Sometimes I don’t hear the Lord speak to me until I begin writing my thoughts down on paper.  And get this.  Sometimes I write down the verses I just read, word for word, on my journal, and the meaning of these words comes to life!  Those few seconds between what I see on my Bible and what I write on paper are just enough time for the Holy Spirit to whisper a thought into my heart.  The same thing happens when I choose to write my prayers.  Those moments between my thoughts and my words on paper are the physical times I hear God’s voice speak to me.  Those little thoughts that I hear in between words on paper… THAT’s God’s Spirit speaking to me.  I hear it only when I take the time to jot my thoughts down.  To take it from being just a thought on my head, to physical words on a journal.  So, I take notes.  I put my thoughts on paper.  And I often write some of the verses down… and allow the Holy Spirit to speak through the echoing of those verses. 

8.  Focus on a lesson learned.

Before I close my Bible each morning. I try to focus on a WORD, a verse, a main thought or lesson that I want to remember for that day.  Something I can digest throughout the day.  It helps me to remember “the point” of it all.  And to also look forward to something new every day.  If I can learn something new about God every day, shouldn’t that be motivating me to continue to seek Him daily?  If the goal is to KNOW God better, learning something new about Him and His character through His Word is VERY EXCITING to me!  How about you?

9.  Continue to listen through the day.

Be aware of God’s voice throughout the day.  It might be a song you hear, the majesty of His creation, the tender moments with a child, that convicting feeling you have when your 5 year-old catches you saying a “mean” thing, or when a message from a dear friend reaches your inbox.  God is everywhere!  And He walks with me no matter where I go.  Even as I lay my head down to sleep, His presence still inspires me (there’s a Psalm for that!).  I remember VIVIDLY hearing God’s voice telling me to GET UP and OPEN MY BIBLE at 5:58am (yes, folks!  That’s 5:58 IN THE MORNING!).  Who else would ask me to open my Bible?  Not myself.  Not my conscious or unconscious self.  Not the enemy.  So, it HAD to come from God Himself.  Right?  Absolutely!  And He spoke directly to me through a passage of Scripture I was needing for that coming day.  Amazing stuff!  I can’t make these things up!  It’s happened more than once.  SO… if you hear a still small voice, a whisper, or even a LOUD voice telling you to PICK UP YOUR BIBLE and READ IT, do yourself a favor and DO IT!  It’s God telling you to LISTEN!  He’s got something important to tell you!

10.  Share it with someone else.

I get excited when I see the fingerprints of God in His Word.  A story, a word, or a verse.  Get excited about God’s Word!  Tell it to your children.  Tell it to your friends.  Tell it to your spouse!  Believe me!  If reading God’s Word is exciting for you, others will see the LIGHT and LIFE reflecting in your joy!  I recently read about the fiery cloud that accompanied the tabernacle while the Israelites were in the wilderness…  (Numbers 9:15-23)  How cool is that!  That God’s presence was a visible provision of guidance and direction!  If the cloud remained over the Tabernacle, the people were to stay and set up camp.  But at the Lord’s command, the cloud could move, the people would break camp and move on.  Sometimes it would be for a month or year, and sometimes just overnight!  Wow!  What faith that took!  I could just see myself there.  Would I grumble?  Would I get excited to pick up my tent and move on?  The very presence of God was so visible to the people then.  Crazy thought… but… if He were to SHOW HIMSELF to me on a daily basis today, wouldn’t I just SHOW UP for it?  Wouldn’t I just drop everything I was doing to follow His presence?  His “fiery cloud”? 

So, there it is. 

Let me encourage you today.  God longs to spend time with us.  He loves us!  And in my own imperfection, I want God to show Himself daily to me.  To be my God.  To be my strength.  To be my guide.  I want God to be my “fiery cloud”.  But it starts with our decision to intentionally come into His presence.  We don’t worship the Bible.  But we worship the ONE who inspired it and speaks through it today.  Our source of truth.  Scripture was given to us, as a gift.  But we need to receive it.   And read it. 

I strongly believe that it’s in God’s Word that you will find an increased knowledge of Jesus, a better understanding of His character, and a complete and holy guide for your faith. 

Start today. 

Wherever you are…

Memorizing Scripture

Right here!  Right now!  I'm committing!

Okay... scary, but I'm committing to memorizing Scripture this month.

I usually would not be that excited about any type of "challenge".  But this one I'm doing to join our church family in memorizing a passage in the Bible to prepare us for what God is wanting us to "hear" this month, collectively, as a church.

Excited to see what God will do!

Even more excited to experience His miracles today and at the end of this month!

Have you ever worked through a passage of Scripture to memorize it?

The last time I did that, it was a couple of years ago when Natalie called all of us, moms, at Mottts to a 40-Day Prayer Challenge.  I was able to memorize Ephesians 6:10-18, the Armor of God passage.

Here's the passage for this month.  

The Supremacy of the Son of God:

"The Son is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For in him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things have been created through him and for him.  He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.  And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy.  For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross."  Colossians 1:15-20

Impossible for God?

As I was scrolling down my Instagram feed this afternoon, I came across this quote.

I couldn't stop thinking about it.

I read it over, and over, and over again....

Then re-read it...

And I began to think about the Sunday School lesson I had already been planning for tomorrow.

Prayer.

"The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working." James 5:16b

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7

"Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever.  Amen."  Ephesians 3:20-21

How often do I pray like I REALLY believe that God will answer my prayers?  How often do I pray for the impossible, having faith that God will make the impossible possible for Him?  When was the last time I prayed for the impossible?  If there is absolutely NOTHING impossible for God, why am I doubting His power?  Why am I doubting His goodness?  Why do I doubt His faithfulness?  

I may not be bluntly saying that I "doubt"... but by not presenting my requests to Him, I am holding on to my human anxieties and fears, and getting in the way of God to work.  Unbelief.

I believe God has GOOD plans for me.  Absolutely!  

I believe God has blessing after blessing reserved for me.  Absolutely!

I believe that He is GOOD and that His love endures FOREVER.  Absolutely!

So, help me, Lord!  Help my unbelief!

Help me to pray hard.

To pray without ceasing.

To pray with thanksgiving.

Believing.

Knowing that my prayers have great POWER.

That you hear me.

Amen.

A Private Conversation

The Lord has done great things in me!

The forgiveness process He's brought me through with different people in my life brings me to the place I am today.  I DO feel free,... but something still lingers... What is it?  The Lord continues to bring my counseling career to mind.  My "dream" of going back to work... The resentment I feel towards my stay-at-home role... (tears...)  

God, I want to embrace my role.  And be at PEACE.  I get to do that!  Help me to be present.  Help me to EMBRACE that!  Could I stop "wishing"?

Let it go, Helen!  I haven't finished my work in you.  You need this time at home for things I will use you in the future.  Let me work through you.  Stop being so hard on yourself.  It shouldn't be always easy.  It takes WORK.  But don't resent it.  I've promised to be with you.  And I never lie.  I'll be with you.

Create in me a clean heart, God.  

Thank you, God, for speaking to me this morning!

"In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials,  so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.  Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls." 1 Peter 1:6-9

(*exerpt from my journaling & reflecting time at MOTTTS this morning)

A Gift Within A Gift

A little over a year ago, Joel and I received a generous gift from a dear couple from our church:

An overnight stay at Shepherd's Gate Inn, the beautiful retreat home of REST Ministries.

We were humbled by the gift, and excited about the opportunity to "get away" and rest.

However, this gift was given to us after the birth of our 3rd child.  Noah was only a couple months old and we were unable to take him with us then.

So, we waited.  And waiting for the perfect time to retreat resulted in a few more stressful months.

But, oh... how we serve a Perfect God!  A God whose timing is Perfect and who shows up faithfully in our time of need.  My personal basic need was for REST.  I looked forward to the time Joel and I were able to retreat and rest together.  My daily and weekly demands of caring for our family, our church family, and friends were starting to weight a bit heavier lately, so I deeply desired to "get away".  

So, on a cold but beautiful evening in January (well over a year AFTER we were blessed with this gift), Joel and I arrived at Shepherd's Gate Inn.  From the moment I saw that place, I sensed God's love and care for people like me and Joel.  People who were tired and in need of rest.  To take a deep breath from the daily noise.  

It. Was. Beautiful!

It was GRAND!

It was what we needed...

We were warmly welcomed by our hosts, Chuck and Becka.  Chuck opened the big double doors, helped us with our luggage, while Becka welcomed us with her genuine and warm smile!  Our first impression of them was more than positive.  It was trusting!

The time of arrival was also perfect!  Dinner time!  The house smelled like a good homecooked meal!  And believe me!  Usually, if I don't have to cook, I'll eat anything!  But this was exceptionally blessing my senses and my palate that evening.  Yum!  So good!  Janet, one of their faithful volunteers, truly knocked it out of the park!  From the meals to the dessert!  Delicious!!!  And it was at the dinner table where Chuck shared with us the story behind this ministry.  God is SO faithful!  I was humbled by the reality that God is in control of EVERY detail.  If you happen to have a few moments, PLEASE, do yourself a favor and visit their website to get more information about this place.  Their testimony is incredible!  Hearing how God brought this place to pass, the means by which they were able to acquire this incredible home, and the faith and prayers behind every piece of the story.  Amazing!  Absolutely incredible!

REST Ministry and Shepherd's Gate Inn truly ministered to us by giving us the space we needed.  We took that deep breath we needed.  Chuck and Becka took a few moments after dinner to talk to us about the importance of REST and to pray for us.  To pray WITH us.  To pray FOR us!  And oh... their prayers were answered - tenfold!  We experienced physical healing and multiplied rest!  Thank you, God! 

Despite being such a short time there, between enjoying a quiet evening, getting to sleep in without the crying and demands of kids, spending extra time in the Word with the Lord, and going for a walk with Joel while we prayed for our family and our kids, this time away will be tucked away as a special weekend for me.  

I am so thankful that our church allowed us to take a weekend off.  

I am so thankful for our friends who saw the need for Joel and I to "get away".

I am so thankful for my in-laws who took the kids for that time.

We already talked about going back there in the near future.  

You can contact REST Ministries and Shepherd's Gate Inn by going to their website HERE.  You can also find them on Facebook at www.facebook.com/ShepherdsGateInn  

Beyond Me

Will you, please, allow me to just sit here and share some thoughts today?

Thank you!

I've learned a very big lesson this past weekend.  I've learned that God is Sovereign and completely and utterly in control of my life.  I've learned that despite my poor choices, my lack of obedience, and less than perfect attitude, HE is BEYOND ME.

Yup.

I'm realizing, as I type, that this should be a basic lesson for any and every Christian, right?  If you believe in God, you SHOULD know that He is God and is in control.  Right?

But for some odd reason, I've gotten too accustomed to living my Christian life under the impression that God is reacting and blessing my life according to what I choose to do.

Sure, He gives me absolute freedom of choice.

Sure, He gives me complete freedom to live my life according to my own imperfect human will.

However, this past weekend I learned that God is passionate about me.  

He wants me to flourish.  

He protects my every step.

He goes before and behind me.

He is alive.

He creates and completes my thoughts.

He owns the universe and holds it in His hands.

Wow....

When God placed in my heart to become a part of a business, I had no idea this business would lead me to understand Him and love Him better.

Ok... let me take you back... a few weeks ago.

December 2014.  

I knew the yearly It Works Conference was going to happen on January 15-17 2015.  I hesitated to spend money on airline tickets.  I hesitated on spending money on my registration.  It was expensive.  I'm not gonna lie.  It took some convincing myself and my family to be able to push that "submit" button at checkout.

Last Thursday, January 15, 2015.

I hopped on an air plane and flew to Orlando, FL.  Without my husband.  Without the kids.  On my own.  My journal entry that morning read this: "The morning of Day 1 of Limelite.  Super excited and a bit nervous.  Anxious.  Still unsure, but I AM TRUSTING the Lord is with me.  I am NOT alone... But no worries.  This will one day be a testimony of success."  Then, I read Psalm 23, which says, "The Lord is my shepherd... He makes me lie down...He leads me...He restores my soul."  

It was in the midst of bright lights, loud crowds, and an overload of excitement, celebration, and information, that I heard the Lord's still small voice saying, "Helen... I am writing your story.  Right here.  Right now."  As I sat in that conference listening to numerous testimonies and stories of success from people just like me, it HIT ME!  God is BEYOND ME.  This business choice is BEYOND ME.  Just like God led those people on stage to become the leaders they are now, just like God brought those people out of financial debt into financial freedom, He is also writing my story.  Today.  Right here.  Right now.  

It was only through full surrender of my thoughts, my attitude, my hopes, my control, and my FEARS, that God was able to begin a good work in me.  I no longer want to live in fear.  I no longer want to make choices based on fear.  I no longer want to make decisions based on fear.  

Instead,

I want to live in courage.  I want to make choices based on whether it is an act of love and worship to my God.  I want to make decisions based on trust... trust that God is in my decisions.  Trusting that God is in control.

And I'm choosing to walk in obedience in stay on this It Works journey.  What other network marketing company could have this caliber of INTEGRITY?  Their complete surrender to God and commitment to listening to the Holy Spirit to guide the future of this business was absolutely mind blowing!  So.  I'm choosing to stay.  I'm choosing to thrive.  I'm choosing to trust. 

Today is a new day.  My faith is in a God who lives IN me... not "out there, somewhere."  He is WITH me.  I am NOT alone.  Whom shall I fear?  Of whom shall I be afraid?  

So, if you're facing any kind of fear, any type of anxiety, any form of doubt...  Remember that God is IN you.  He walks WITH you.  He is God.  

God is writing my story.  And that's BEYOND ME.  Do you believe He's writing yours, too?

************************************************************************

I am blown away!

It Works Global announced at Conference that they're giving Double the Bonuses from last year!  

$20,000, $30,000, $50,000, $100,000!

AND, for the first time, EVER, they're giving $500 Bonus to anyone who becomes a new Distributor and is able to get 3 friends to join their team and reach Ruby status by March 31, 2015!  And that's on top of residual income/commissions and current bonuses!

WATCH me, or JOIN me!

Before I lay myself to sleep...

Tonight it's just me...

No fancy outlines.  No pretty pictures.  No deep and insightful quotes.

Just me.

Tomorrow morning marks the beginning of my firstborn son's academic career.  He's starting Kindergarten and it's painfully hitting me that he will no longer be spending the biggest bulk of his time under my care.

Oh Jesus... watch over my big boy.  May his steps be ever so protected by YOU.  

I know there will be a day when I'll look back to this very day and reminisce it with fond memories.  And I've talked to many parents lately who kindly reminded me (well... "warned" me) NOT to blink, or I'll seriously miss the entirety of my days... and years.  

Wow.

Can I just freeze this night?  Can I just stop the clock?  When I remember "back in the day" when I spent my days in school, and home was where I rested.  Home was where I could relax, and eat extra snacks, and play.  And sleep.  Home was where I didn't have to pretend.  It's where I knew I could throw my backpack to the side and just... be.  

Yes, Joshua went to preschool last year.  5 days a week.  However, in my own little limited mind, he was still under my care during "most of the day".  Right?  He was at school for a few hours in the morning, then he was HOME.  But now... wow.  He'll be "gone" for...  EIGHT hours!  

Jesus, watch over my big boy.  And when he faces opportunities to grow, may he jump on it! May he develop a love for learning.  May his curious and inquisitive mind be used with purpose.  May he grow his love for books and reading.  May he remember to "pray to Jesus" when he feels alone.  Preserve his innocence.  Provide good friends for him.  Will he have a good buddy?  

Let me NOT blink.  

I know he'll be all right.  

And so will I.

The Work Within

Dear God - 

I get it.  

You're doing some work in my heart and soul lately.

I didn't know I was under construction in the areas where you started digging this past week.

I get it.

Through the busy weeks, warm days, full moments, 

You show up... and show me that I still have a lot of "growing up" to do.

There are no words to fully express the incredible feeling of freedom, dependence, and joy I want to have.  

I WANT IT.  

I want to feel free.

I want to depend on you.

I want to feel joy.  

To HAVE joy.

I cannot lie... I feel tired.  Anger.  Dissatisfaction. 

I want to rest.

I want to sit.

I want to breathe.  

Deep.

Create space.

I want to sip coffee with a good friend.

I want to touch sunshine.

I want to feel drops of rain...

The wind on my tired skin.

I WANT YOU, God!

To hear a word of encouragement.

To sense your presence.

To see color.

Am I the only one who desires and needs a "day off"?  

Am I the odd woman who cannot get her hormones under control?

No blaming!  No excuses!  No complaining!

But how can I find healing without revisiting past pain and hurt?

This past week I realized that I'm living with the aftermath of problems I once hid behind pretty wallpaper.

I moved on without dealing with my faults from the past.

Lord... I'm glad that you want... you desire... to heal me.

Thank you for the provision of forgiveness you offer me TODAY.

Thank you that in YOU, I don't need to live a solemn life.

Thank you that you promised to turn my mourning into dancing.

I may miss friends and certain relationships... but you're the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

Forever.

Do your work, Lord.

I get it.  

I need it.

Amen